ferber, ferberize, ferberization

I've noticed that several times a week someone is arriving at this blog by googling one of the above words. Poor souls! I understand the desperation you feel, so here I am to tell you the rest of our ferberization story.

About a month ago I was bragging about how we had "succeeded" at ferberizing our 7 month old. After a couple rough nights of letting her cry, she was sleeping in her crib for most of the night until about 5 a.m. when she would cry and Tim would get her and bring her into our bed. But then she got croup and then another cold, and the whole "sleeping in the crib" plan was completely shot to hell.

Finally two nights ago I said enough! I put her to bed after nursing her, and she woke up (as usual) about an hour and a half later and started crying. I was still awake and Tim was in bed. I went in our bedroom and told him that I wanted to let her cry instead of getting her up again. He agreed, but only for the first 5 minutes until her cry turned into something blood-curdling. I had to sit on him to keep him from rescuing her, good papa that he is! Finally I went in and talked to her and rubbed her head without picking her up from the crib. It was SO hard not to pick her up because I knew the screaming would stop immediately if I did, but instead I caressed her face and head and helped her get calmed down. Several times she almost fell asleep while I stood over her crib with my hand on her, but this kid is a fighter! As soon as her eyelids got heavy she would JERK! her little legs to keep herself awake. Finally I just covered her up and said "night night!" and left the room. Was she ever furious about that!

We spent the first half of the night listening to her scream, then calm down, then start screaming again. Tim went in once to comfort her without picking her up, and again she was really mad when he left. But about half way through the night, she got tired enough that she just fell asleep. She woke up maybe two more times and tried to get worked up again, but didn't get very far because she was so tired.

The second night (last night) was a completely different story. I put her to bed after nursing her, and she woke up an hour later and cried for 30 seconds. This happened another 2 times, and the last I heard she was chatting and blowing raspberries about 5 a.m. before falling asleep again. The kid took a crash course in self-comfort and is passing with flying colors!

So my advice to anyone who gets here via a search engine is that you obviously aren't a "family bed" type parent or you wouldn't be googling Ferber! If you feel like you it's time to get back to sleeping a full night in the position of your choice instead of twisted up like a pretzel with a little body attached to you, maybe it is time to take the leap. If we could do it, you can too and it will probably be less painful than you think. Good luck!